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ADH093
01-29-2006, 05:08 AM
September 3, 2004
Dear Jack,

You haven’t written in a while, I hope you’re all right. Sara misses you. Everyday she comes into the kitchen with this hope in her eyes, like she thinks you’ll be sitting there, and everyday I have to watch that hope fade bit by bit. Please, come home soon. We all miss you.

Love, Jan

September 2, 2004
Jack,

Tom here. How’s it going down there, bro? This may surprise you (it surprised me), but I wish you would come home, just so I can actually hear you make fun of my “wacky” sense of humor.
Seriously, everyone misses you, but I know you feel you have to do this. Just be careful, cause I’ll never forgive you if you die down there.

Still prettier than you,
Tom

September 1, 2004
Dear Son,

How are things down there? I saw something on the news the other day about a helicopter going down in Iraq and I couldn’t sleep. I know we’ve argued, but if you could just send me something so that I know you’re still alive? That news report sort of reminded what you’re facing out there. I just want you to know that your mother and I are proud of the man you’ve become.

With Love,
Jack Sr. & Mary Erins


August 30, 2004
dear daddy,

how are you. mommy says every day you will be home soon but you never are. when are you coming back? i miss you. im scared about mommy. she cries somtimes. i can hear her from my room. she misses you a lot. come back please. i love you.

from sara

August 29, 2004
Somewhere in Iraq…

“Shit!” growled Jack Erins, drawing back from the bullet torn helicopter door.
“Howardson’s down!” yelled someone.
Jack turned. His friend Mark Howardson was lying on his back on the helicopter floor, clutching his side. Blood was running from the bullet wound.
“Oh Jesus oh Jesus oh Jesus,” Howardson was muttering. A medic was crouched next to him.
“He’s lost a lung!” yelled the medic. “I can’t stabilize him, we need to get him back to base.”
“I can’t keep the chopper up!” yelled the pilot. Gunfire from the ground strafed the helicopter. “Erins, would you stop ogling and shoot!” Snapping out of his daze, Jack switched off the safety of his assault rifle and moved toward the door. He never made it.
Jack heard the pilot’s death cry as the tilting chopper’s windshield erupted inward. “Dammit!” roared the medic. “Somebody get on the stick!”
Jack darted into the cockpit and pushed the pilot’s body out of the chair. He grabbed the stick and tried to pull out of the dive, but they were too far in with too much damage. His last thought was for his daughter as his world was absorbed in flames.


September 4, 2004

Dear Ms. Erins,

It is my sad duty to inform you that your husband, Sgt. Jack Erins, died in a helicopter crash six days ago. Sgt. Erins was a good soldier, and he believed in what he was doing. That is all I can ask of a man.

Sincerely,
General Matthew Marshall

THE END

Author’s note: This was created it because we already know what the war is; I hope this helps you think about it on a personal level. This story is fictional, but at the same time it is happening all the time. You can interpret it however you want. But don't forget it.

Bullet_in_my_Head
01-29-2006, 11:07 AM
OMG*crys* thats really really sad im crying

Scooter
01-29-2006, 06:56 PM
Wow. Nuff said.

misterjad
01-31-2006, 10:12 PM
you could definately develope this into something a lot more meaningful. keep working on it.

kips
02-01-2006, 11:34 AM
a very effective piece of writing

xu_yun_sha
02-03-2006, 04:39 AM
nice story.......

xJennx
02-10-2006, 05:11 PM
wow.
clever idea, and it alerts people really well about the issues in Iraq
very good
xjennx

xJennx
02-10-2006, 05:20 PM
hey, i've just read it again, and if you keep writing things this good, everyone else will go out of business, LOL!!!
keep going!
It's brilliant,
xjennx

camelsrule!!!
02-10-2006, 07:27 PM
wow really effective bought tears to my eyes

ADH093
02-11-2006, 06:19 AM
Thank you.

blondiE
02-11-2006, 11:55 PM
i can really relate to this story and i think you showed the emotion of the family really well in the letters. good work

ADH093
02-17-2006, 01:32 AM
Thank you.

krysiheartsnerds
02-17-2006, 08:57 PM
WOW! I really really really like this story!! ALOT!!! OMG....i love it! Thank you for writing somthing diffrent! This is great!

a.wannabe.writer
02-17-2006, 10:11 PM
wow, great job!! absolutely beautiful! it touched me deep, because my dad used to be in the army, and everyday i thank God that he never died. i feel selfish, because i would think about him not coming home, then i would be grateful when he did. and i feel so horrible for all the families out there that lose a loved one to war. it cuts me deep. so, great job, got some tears flowing. .... beautiful!!

btw- id love to see more of your work like this!! (if you already have, ill read it!!!)

ADH093
02-18-2006, 07:50 PM
Thank you both.

BlueEyedDancer8
02-19-2006, 05:20 AM
ok, i'm literally crying! I love the way you use reverse chronological order in the begining then skip to the 4th, after everyhting else. It's very effective

ADH093
02-19-2006, 08:08 PM
Thank you.

Faye_08
02-20-2006, 12:55 AM
Wow I just read that. it's really good.

ADH093
03-08-2006, 08:56 PM
Fans come and go, I suppose.

Emo-Death
03-09-2006, 12:15 AM
Omg *tear tear* that was sad!! and awsome

ADH093
03-10-2006, 06:08 PM
Cool, thanks.

ADH093
06-23-2006, 02:55 AM
Does this forum even have something to get rid of threads that no one reads?

Faye
06-23-2006, 07:19 PM
That was really good, sad, but good.

ADH093
06-23-2006, 08:25 PM
That was the idea. Thank you.

RaZorsharp
06-23-2006, 08:33 PM
Wow. That broke my heart... the daughter's letter, and the part where he thought about her before he died.... that really got to me. How you described everything in letters (except that one part) made the 'soldier away from home' thing seem more realistic. That was an exceptional read. You're right... it does happen all the time. We just watch the news and think, "Another one dead. Oh well." but we never realize how much those that have lost their lives, and their families, have went through.

ADH093
06-23-2006, 08:53 PM
Thank you.

skippy
06-26-2006, 04:56 PM
a real touching story, i thought it was cool how you got to hear from different family members although i had wanted him to write back it was well written. I personally enjoyed (for lack of a better word) the fact that the mother saw it in the news before getting the letter of his death. I liked how it was different from other stories here too.

skippy
10-12-2006, 11:56 PM
short and brilliant, exactly what a short story should be, this story will stay with me for a long time, and for that i applaud you. This is my fav of the day for sure

Night
10-13-2006, 12:08 AM
This is really sad.... You really brought out what families, or in this case just one, are feeling about their love ones in Iraq.... Makes you kind of wonder what the point of it is.... All I see is it causing a whole lot of pain and suffering.... Good job!!!!

greenoj
10-13-2006, 12:32 AM
wow......powerfully descriptive, and it made me think...awesome job.

ADH093
12-08-2006, 10:22 PM
Thank you.

vnt31
12-08-2006, 10:27 PM
oh god...that is fucking sad...

KittyKatTina2007
12-10-2006, 01:52 AM
that is so sad.. you did an awesome job.. I think you should do more writings like this.. the letter form..

vnt31
12-10-2006, 02:53 AM
I think you would do good with that kat

mistyeyes_12
12-10-2006, 04:57 PM
Not a lot of people are writing about his and it is very sad. I started feeling tears coming into my eyes. It is very effective and it is worth writing about. I do believe that you can create this into something more if you tried.

ADH093
12-12-2006, 01:04 PM
Thank you all.