thecritic
01-22-2006, 03:17 PM
No plot.
Few characters.
Just a voyage...
Keira woke up. The air seemed to be lightly sizzling around her, but the noize was fading quickly. She opened her eyes. The world throbbed, or perhaps that was her head. The dark and empty sky that stretched in front of her was broken only by the swaying of the bare branches of the trees that stood around her. As everything came into focus, she clambered out of the muddy pit she woke up in and brushed herself off. The night air was warm and soothing, calm, but somehow solemn. The woods around her were not frightening as such, though she could only see a few metres, but the trees were old and gnarled, crippled by the years. There was something strange about this place. She felt like she had left Earth altogether. She couldn't have possibly known what being on another planet feels like, she was just an ordinary schoolgirl, but sometimes you get a strong feeling, however unjustified, that things are not as they seem.
She began to walk. The woods were totally silent; no birds crooned, no twigs on the floor snapped. The ground was surprisingly springy, like she was walking on a giant cushion. She could have been, for all she knew at the time. The only thing she was totally sure of was that she wasn't on the way to Mr Burton's double maths any more.
She had been walking down one of the mazelike corridors of Rivenstone High School with her friends, and suddenly the world disolved into eerie redness. She had woken up in the mud. It was coming back to her now. A startling thought hit her; what had happened to her in the reality she knew? Had she vanished? Did she die? Her uncle had a heart attack last month, could she have gone the same way?
She stumbled over a root and fell to the ground. Her shoe was dragged off her foot and caught under the root. She wasn't hurt, but she was certain that she had seen something glint in the side of a hillock a few paces away, the one with the huge oak perched on top of it, the rootstock covering it like the wrinkled hand of a giant pensioner. She walked up to it. There was nothing strange about the mound of dirtied clay, minus a few ants crawling down the side of it, their tiny black bodies reflecting the moonlight.
Keira didn't remember seeing a moon when she was lying in the mud, she had assumed that it had been in another direction. But as she tried to find the moon in the heavy sky to reassure herself that she hadn't vanished out of the solar system, she couldn't see it at all. The trees wouldn't be obscuring the light, because they had no leaves, but when she bent over to nurse her ankle that she bashed against the root, there weren't any on the ground. She gazed at the ants, trying to find where the reflection of the moonlight on their glistening backs pointed, but when she worked it out and looked upwards again, there was definately nothing there.
She was panicking now, almost ready to scream. She was known for having a cool head in times of trouble, but this was insane! Vanishing and reappearing somewhere with no moon! Either her or the world was going insane!
She looked around in desparation. Her show got stuck under the root, but when she went to retrive it, about to burst into running as far and as fast as she could, the root had vanished too. She dragged her fingers down into the soil, but there was no trace of the root anywhere. She noticed the glint again when she wrenched the shoe onto her foot. This time she was going to find out what it was. She stormed over to the hillock and bashed at it with her fists. She pummeled at it with her fists, the thick clay falling away as she bashed. Suddenly, the clay began to convulse silently. It stirred itself right in front of Keira's eyes. It shook and rippled, all without a sound. Kiera crawled backwards in fear. Staring straight at the clay, which seemed to be transforming into a door.
It only took ten seconds for the strange transformation to happen. When Keira nervously paced up to the door with intent, she noticed the brass door handle gleaming in the moonlight without a moon. That must have been what she had seen. The door was green, the paint peeling off like the door had been there for decades. There were glass panels in the top half of the door, one of which was smashed, showing the mud beneath. Keira prodded the mud through the broken pane. It felt... ordinary.
A strange urge came over her to wrench this door open. She grabbed at the door handle, expecting the entire door to pull away from the hill. It didn't. It was fixed to the hill at it's hinges. She finally dragged the door open, not knowing what to expect. Just mud. On the other side of the door, there was just a wall of the mud. She had hoped for something a little more interesting, but it wasn't going to happen. She stormed away in anger.
'Hello?! Is anybody there?!'
She cried out, her voice cutting through the air, hoping someone would leap out from behind a tree and save her from this strange world. Nothing happened.
She threw a final glance of resent back at the open door in the hill. Light engulfed her. She felt so drowsy all of a sudden. Claws of burning white light stretched around her. The strange universe she had woken up in dissolved. The tendrils off energy finally loosened their grip and laid her down in a room, leaving the air sizzling behind them as they vanished.
Keira woke up somewhere completely different.
TBC...
Where did she wake up? What happens next? You, yes YOU, get to decide what happens to Keira in her Voyage of Miscellany. PM me with your ideas, and thankyou for reading!
Few characters.
Just a voyage...
Keira woke up. The air seemed to be lightly sizzling around her, but the noize was fading quickly. She opened her eyes. The world throbbed, or perhaps that was her head. The dark and empty sky that stretched in front of her was broken only by the swaying of the bare branches of the trees that stood around her. As everything came into focus, she clambered out of the muddy pit she woke up in and brushed herself off. The night air was warm and soothing, calm, but somehow solemn. The woods around her were not frightening as such, though she could only see a few metres, but the trees were old and gnarled, crippled by the years. There was something strange about this place. She felt like she had left Earth altogether. She couldn't have possibly known what being on another planet feels like, she was just an ordinary schoolgirl, but sometimes you get a strong feeling, however unjustified, that things are not as they seem.
She began to walk. The woods were totally silent; no birds crooned, no twigs on the floor snapped. The ground was surprisingly springy, like she was walking on a giant cushion. She could have been, for all she knew at the time. The only thing she was totally sure of was that she wasn't on the way to Mr Burton's double maths any more.
She had been walking down one of the mazelike corridors of Rivenstone High School with her friends, and suddenly the world disolved into eerie redness. She had woken up in the mud. It was coming back to her now. A startling thought hit her; what had happened to her in the reality she knew? Had she vanished? Did she die? Her uncle had a heart attack last month, could she have gone the same way?
She stumbled over a root and fell to the ground. Her shoe was dragged off her foot and caught under the root. She wasn't hurt, but she was certain that she had seen something glint in the side of a hillock a few paces away, the one with the huge oak perched on top of it, the rootstock covering it like the wrinkled hand of a giant pensioner. She walked up to it. There was nothing strange about the mound of dirtied clay, minus a few ants crawling down the side of it, their tiny black bodies reflecting the moonlight.
Keira didn't remember seeing a moon when she was lying in the mud, she had assumed that it had been in another direction. But as she tried to find the moon in the heavy sky to reassure herself that she hadn't vanished out of the solar system, she couldn't see it at all. The trees wouldn't be obscuring the light, because they had no leaves, but when she bent over to nurse her ankle that she bashed against the root, there weren't any on the ground. She gazed at the ants, trying to find where the reflection of the moonlight on their glistening backs pointed, but when she worked it out and looked upwards again, there was definately nothing there.
She was panicking now, almost ready to scream. She was known for having a cool head in times of trouble, but this was insane! Vanishing and reappearing somewhere with no moon! Either her or the world was going insane!
She looked around in desparation. Her show got stuck under the root, but when she went to retrive it, about to burst into running as far and as fast as she could, the root had vanished too. She dragged her fingers down into the soil, but there was no trace of the root anywhere. She noticed the glint again when she wrenched the shoe onto her foot. This time she was going to find out what it was. She stormed over to the hillock and bashed at it with her fists. She pummeled at it with her fists, the thick clay falling away as she bashed. Suddenly, the clay began to convulse silently. It stirred itself right in front of Keira's eyes. It shook and rippled, all without a sound. Kiera crawled backwards in fear. Staring straight at the clay, which seemed to be transforming into a door.
It only took ten seconds for the strange transformation to happen. When Keira nervously paced up to the door with intent, she noticed the brass door handle gleaming in the moonlight without a moon. That must have been what she had seen. The door was green, the paint peeling off like the door had been there for decades. There were glass panels in the top half of the door, one of which was smashed, showing the mud beneath. Keira prodded the mud through the broken pane. It felt... ordinary.
A strange urge came over her to wrench this door open. She grabbed at the door handle, expecting the entire door to pull away from the hill. It didn't. It was fixed to the hill at it's hinges. She finally dragged the door open, not knowing what to expect. Just mud. On the other side of the door, there was just a wall of the mud. She had hoped for something a little more interesting, but it wasn't going to happen. She stormed away in anger.
'Hello?! Is anybody there?!'
She cried out, her voice cutting through the air, hoping someone would leap out from behind a tree and save her from this strange world. Nothing happened.
She threw a final glance of resent back at the open door in the hill. Light engulfed her. She felt so drowsy all of a sudden. Claws of burning white light stretched around her. The strange universe she had woken up in dissolved. The tendrils off energy finally loosened their grip and laid her down in a room, leaving the air sizzling behind them as they vanished.
Keira woke up somewhere completely different.
TBC...
Where did she wake up? What happens next? You, yes YOU, get to decide what happens to Keira in her Voyage of Miscellany. PM me with your ideas, and thankyou for reading!